Ping Pong

I woke up early this morning. I felt very happy. I had a gorgeous boy lying in my room. He is actually hot. In a special sort of way. You know, a boy next door but such warmth and genuineness emanates from him… If he would not live fucking other side of the globe I would probably ask him to marry me. Well, maybe that’s too early to say J

Earlier last week we had gone to see a Ping Pong show. You know, old tarts stuffing weird stuff to their cunts. If you’ve seen a cunt before you would be surprised. But what reactions did they get from the audience. Straight guys were looking like tinkering: “have I fucked that!” and gay guys going “oh for fuck sakes, this is exactly why I am proud to be gay!” and women… well, the either laughed or puked. My close straight female friend could not watch half of the show. She really felt dreadfully ill.

So what are these ping pong shows? Well I shall enlighten you.

Setting the scene one:

First you select old females to dance around in a podium built into the middle of some ghastly and

snotty bar filled with cigarette smoke and half-lighted up with old neon lights.

Secondly you ask people to pay obscene prices for their cheap locally brewed beer or cocktails made from concentrated juices, fake Vodka Podka, and flat mixers.

Thirdly, you ask people to gather around the podium in awe. The more the merrier.

This is the setting for the show. I forgot to mention you did drive to some God forsaken joint where the only transportation back to the city is provided by the establishment for a very hospitable price. Say, half of what you happen to have.

Setting the scene two:

First tart arrives almost naked. She’s smiling without any visible teeth and the effect is bringing the audience to a halt. She starts her act by nodding to the audience. The she smiles to the north and sticks out her behind to south. And she orthodoxically repeats the act in all main directions. We all get a share of her cunt and toothless smile. The place started to have a cheerful feel. This is repeated before every act.

After the start ritual weird things start pouring out of those poor pussies. Flowers, serpentine, fluffy toys… followed by needles, razorblades, round shaped things I couldn’t make out what they were. Well that wasn’t all. Then come the weird stuff. One of the ladies stuffed two cigarettes up hers and started huffing and puffing. It was my time to throw up. Have I seen a sight like that in my life – like ever? NO! It was absolutely horrendous! How can there be such things in this universe!

And the show continues. Next flushing down the pipe came a shoal of gold fish (a bloody tank full of gold fish!) At that point my friend fall of from her chair.  We laughed – at her. Gold fish followed by turtles and frogs. One of the girls with small frogs inside her did have a bit of struggle there but there they came pomping alive as ever! After that the show was over, our drinks done and then …. A long bumpy way back home to our hotel. Gosh, disgusting!

I turned around and check my friends butt but it was still nice, small and definitely not loose. No frogs, no turtles, no gold fish… ah, but he was a guy, gay and unbelievably cute! J

Cheerio! J